>:c

Alright so it's been awhile since I blogged. But I'm still doing better at keeping this up than some of you out there (Erin, Lyndsey, Tia - I'm looking at you).

A lot has happened since I got called out at Wendy's (see last post). Most of you know this already but I figured I might as well do my own little catch-up of things so far (plus Brittney reminded me that a blog is an easy way to keep people updated on how I'm doing). So I have cancer. BOO. It's stage 3 colon cancer - most specifically, rectal cancer. Serious bummer. All of my doctors (there are ten of them - I collect them like one would shot glasses or keychains) are stymied as to why I would be lucky enough to have this. I'm not over 60, I don't have a family history of colon cancer, I don't have any of the genetic markers, I'm not a big drinker, I don't have HPV, I've never had colitis or Crohn's and I'm not excessively overweight (though I was maybe on my way there with my frequent Wendy's visits). Nevertheless the tumor is there (I've seen it. Thank you sigmoidoscopy.) and we are where we are.

Since my diagnosis I've been juggling doctors appointments, I've had a surgery to make sure I didn't have ovarian cancer (suspicious cyst showed up on the CT scan) and to move my ovaries out of the upcoming radiation beams, and I've started chemo. It's been fun!

A few things I've discovered in the past month or two, after a lifetime of relative good health in which I had never had stitches, never broken any bones that needed a cast and never spent the night in a hospital. First, turns out my voice changes after surgery. It's a temporary thing (i.e. I believe it's back to normal now), but for the few days I was in the hospital and newly home my voice was about an octave higher (good thing I have a low voice?) and really weak. Maybe it was all the CO2 they pumped into me during the surgery. Maybe it has a similar effect to swallowing helium. I don't know. But it was weird.

Second, ordering hospital food off the menu is kind of fun - like room service. And the food isn't too bad. But when you have no appetite it doesn't really matter WHAT they offer you, you're mostly going to just pick at it and think about how you used to love food.

Third, and this probably should've been first, preparing for surgery sucks. Well, I should be more specific: preparing for laproscopic surgery to remove ovarian cysts and relocate your ovaries and preparing for an endoscopic ultrasound of your rectum both suck. Why? Because they both require you to clean out your colon ahead of time. I think people who have had colonoscopies (sp?) know what I'm talking about.

Now both times I had to clean out I had the misfortune of having doctors' appointments scheduled about the time the cleaning should be done. So for the first surgery I was supposed to drink two bottles of magnesium citrate at 3pm the day before my surgery. That stuff was supposed to take effect approximately 1-3 hours after I drank it. But I had an appointment with my oncologist at 4pm. Right about the time I might need to be hightailing it to the bathroom. I was nervous about what might happen so, naturally, I bought myself the store brand version of Depends. And I waited until about 4pm before I drank the magnesium (so much for following doctor's orders EXACTLY). Not having worn a diaper in something like 28 years, it was an odd experience but surprisingly comfortable. Except for the part where the doctor had to examine and push on my stomach when I'm pretty sure he noticed that my "underwear" was rather...Pamper-ish. But he didn't say anything and neither did I. Anyway that night I didn't really need the diaper but I was glad to have it on hand just in case.

The second time I had to clean out my colon they had me take two enemas beforehand. And each enema says on the box "should be effective in 1-3 minutes" and that you should never hold the enema in for longer than 10 minutes. That made me nervous because my doctor's instructions specifically said to not expel the enema until at LEAST 15 minutes had passed. Fearing this was going to be a tough feat, I again prepared myself with a diaper. And then I put on a meditation tape (yes, cassette tape), did the enema thing, and tried not to count the minutes. I think the meditation tape helped but at 13 minutes I was in trouble. It was no longer a matter of mental toughness, this enema fluid stuff refused to be kept back. That time it was a really good thing I was wearing the diaper. And it was also a good thing the bathroom was six feet away from me. I was supposed to repeat the procedure with the second enema but I didn't even last 6 minutes that time. I dare anyone to try and keep an enema in for 15 minutes. If you can do it I will buy you a value meal at Wendy's.

Anyway I'm just glad that part is over. Now it's on to chemo and radiation! So far the chemo hasn't been too bad. I just hope that continues to last for the next month or so. Fingers crossed.

I feel this post has gotten too long. So I'm cutting it here. But next time I'll have to tell you all the perks of cancer. Namely how all your friends and family bind together to take care of you and give you everything they can think of to make you comfortable and how AWESOME that is.

Oh, and the >:c is the new colon cancer symbol! Created by Emily, it is the new angry/sad face of cancer (move over breast cancer). Plus it has the dual meaning of > = person with cancer is greater than, : = colon (clever), c = c for cancer. Ta-da!

Wendy's Deluxe Value Meals

The other week I was driving home and thought I'd stop by Wendy's. That tends to happen more often than it should but on this particular occasion I had the distinct thought "hey it's been awhile."

As I pulled up to the drive-thru window to hand the worker my card and retrieve my delicious food she said "you come here a lot, don't you."

Yikes. Awk-ward. And just when I thought I was safe. Needless to say I haven't been back since. Except once. And yes, that same girl was working then as well. And yes, she gave me a knowing smile when she saw me again. And no, I won't be going there anymore. At least, not until I think enough time has passed to get to the point where she's either been promoted to assistant manager (or assistant to the manager) or has quit. Just something to get her out of the drive-thru window.

Car Show

On the way home from helping with our hands in a park (I took no pictures of that event) painting and gardening, we decided to stop by the car show that was so fortuitously happening a few blocks away.

We didn't dress up as we ought, though we did decide to ditch our bright yellow shirts, but luckily the car show takes all types.

A purple car? Just the first of many. (Purple cars)

It's a nice car, but I'm still going to look around to see if I can upgrade to a better one.

Hello Don Antonio car! If only you had come full of free tacos.

She knew a car would call to her, and call it did. Baaaa

Also calling to her: 60+ year old men who want to take their pictures with her on their motorcycles. If you're wondering what she's got her feet in they are stirrups. There's a stethoscope on the back of the bike too. Yep, Bon definitely scored today. If things don't work out with the teaching gig nbd because this guy will take care of her forever. Or at least for 5-10 more years.

Sometimes Saturdays are even better than you expect.

Wedding Absentee

The fans

The MPSF Player of the Year
Since you were busy last weekend we will excuse your absence this time.
....Oh and congratulations!

A Short Dance Clip

Ta-da! The wedding dancing video. Or some of it anyway. And posted on the next day to boot. I. Am. GOOD. This will just give you a small taste of the wonders the wedding held.

The first song, apparently, is quite popular amongst school aged children and other people who line dance. I'd never heard it before but I was clearly in the minority. If only Amy had convinced Kim to get out there. I would've recorded the whole song and dedicated an entire post to dancing Kim. And it would've been titled "dancing Kim." But, as Nicki would always say "if wishes were fishes we'd all live in the sea." I never quite got that. We'd live in the sea because we'd want to be close to our wishes? ....What?

Anyway. The point is Kim, for someone who claims to want a blog nod you're certainly not trying very hard to earn it. But if you try out for SYTYCD I will forgive you.

The second song in the video is far less important than checking out the K&M moves. Well on their way to being the hit dancers at the stake dances in ten years.

M&B

Yep it's official. They got married. In Vegas. And it was wonderful. Even though I didn't have time to ride any rollercoasters, see Cher (or Donny and Marie for that matter), eat at the Buffet o' Buffets (to which you can get an all day pass), watch the big fight, shoot any semi-automatic weapons you can only shoot in Vegas or in the army, try my hand at poker or even stick one quarter in the slots, I'd still say this was one of the best trips to Vegas ever.

The bride was gorgeous, the groom was handsome, the wedding was beautiful and the reception was awesome. Even the elements cooperated for the evening and resulted in one heck of a party without anyone's perfectly coiffed hair getting blown all over the place by the wind. That may not seem like a big deal, but trust me, at the time it was. But wind or not, I was sold as soon as I saw the bottles of root beer. Woo hoo - lets get this party started!

I'd post more pictures of the reception but I don't want to make everyone jealous like I did with C&B's reception photos. There wasn't much horseshoe playing this time but there was some line dancing type stuff going on. In fact I think I may just have to post some dancing videos here later (when I'm not about to fall asleep...I should stop blogging at times when I really should be asleep; I tend to start making empty promises that I'll feel guilty about for the entire two month period in between when I said "more to come!" and when I next posted about something completely unrelated to the "more to come" post).

In addition to the reception fun, at night in our hotel rooms we also enjoyed our own version of blackjack with Rook cards and peanut butter m&ms as the currency of choice. I started out okay but when Bryn kept getting 21 every time the rest of us soon found ourselves m&m-less. Leah might have given Bryn a run for her money if she could've remembered to stop eating her cash.

Just a sidenote on the trip, I spent a decent amount of time driving around and, no offense Vegas, but your drivers are not good. What's with going 60mph on the freeway and then coming to a dead stop for no discernible reason in a matter of a few hundred yards? One instance of that I can forgive. But multiple? C'mon. ...On the brightside I didn't get into any accidents so all's well that ends well?

I've gotten totally off track from the original purpose of this post which was to say M&B got married and it was fantastic and I'm really happy for both of them!


Congrats kids. And all the best to both of you.

....also, I can stay at your place when I'm driving home from work and don't want to go all the way back to my place, right? ....Right?

30

I decided to leave my 20s behind with a bang. The 20s were pretty good. Probably peaked around 24, but hey, all around not too shabby. In any case it seemed only appropriate to GBOGH (pronunciation debatable). So we did. "We" because it was mostly a team effort with my role on the team being to show up and party. Done and done. The party weekend was awesome (better descriptions for great/fun/hilarious/fantastic always escape me). I ate a lot of my favorite foods, watched a fire & knife dancer try to shake hands with someone while his hand was aflame*, rode a mechanical bull (and got a little motion sick - stupid vestibular system...but it was still worth it!), got two tickets to that thing I love, played games with the fam, watched my March Madness brackets destroy everyone else's, and generally enjoyed myself immensely.

And to think, it started with a web of lies thanks to all my siblings who said they were too busy to fly in to see me. Examples:

Lie #1: "[sad] you chose to have your birthday bash on the weekend B is heading up a YM campout and I am speaking in ward conference....all committed to long long before..."

Lie #2: "I have to run this babysitting night thing for my calling. Sat night the moms in the ward bring their kids..."

Lie #3: [in response to my question about whether money or prior commitments was keeping my sib away] "It really is more a matter of finals/projects. Between this and next week I'm not even sure when I'll be able to sleep!"

Turns out while I believed them all (although I did think things like "didn't you give a talk a month ago? Are you the only one up there accepting speaking assignments?!" and "babysitting on the weekends?! They really DO take advantage of the newlyweds don't they!"....the projects excuse I believed pretty easily. I basically handed that one out to him. Planning a wedding gives you an out?) I should have known better because they all showed up, surprised me (REALLY surprised me) and redeemed themselves from their lying ways.

It was a fantastic surprise and a great start to my birthday weekend. In fact, by the time the weekend had ended I kind of forgot that I hadn't ACTUALLY turned 30 yet. It seemed like any other celebrating would be superfluous. But don't worry - I continued to party on for the rest of the week anyway. In fact the celebrating continued on until just about...now. Because right now it's settling in that vacation is over and tomorrow it's back to work. boooooo

Sometime when my camera is right next to me and I'm on my computer and can reach over and plug the camera in to download pictures from the party and from my trip (i.e. when the stars align) I'll dedicate more time to blogging about the birthday greatness. But for now I'm too old to still be awake on a weeknight. So I'm going to bed.

And so begins the 30s.

*I saw a guy do that in the PCC luau show when I was probably 6 or so and thought it was AMAZING and vowed then that if a fire & knife guy ever tried to shake MY hand like that I would do it because if it wasn't burning him it HAD to be okay, right? Plus he wouldn't offer it if it wasn't safe, right? ...I don't remember exactly when I finally realized that was flawed reasoning but it was definitely a lot later in life than it should've been.

Body Clocks & Birthdays

Having recently (as in...less than two hours ago) returned from a cross country trip, I would expect my body clock to be all out of whack. It should be a little after 3am to me now. But eh, no, it feels like a little after midnight. That doesn't make any sense. Also what doesn't make sense: my body wakes me up by 7:30a at the latest on the west coast, but first morning of being on the east coast? Up at 7:28a. What the? Shouldn't that be 4:28a to me? ...It CAN'T be that I'm young and spry and my body adjusts to this sort of time travel as if it's nothing because (a) I just had a birthday that objectively kicked me out of the "young and spry" club. And (b) I can't go on roller coasters any more because I'll get sick and throw up due to a failing vestibular system. And if that doesn't scream "you're old and your body knows it" I don't know what does.

But speaking of birthdays. Yesterday (as in March 30 even though it still counts as "today" to me because I haven't gone to sleep yet) was my dad's birthday. So Happy Birthday! You don't look a day over 45. No seriously, you don't. Remember how people thought you were my older brother? That's gotta feel good, right? And then there was that time just a couple years ago when one of my friends was looking at the family Christmas (Valentines Day) card and exclaimed "oh he's dreamy!" and we thought she meant Micah but she meant you. Kelly was there she can back me up on that.

Anyway I know your vestibular system is still functioning just fine so maybe in celebration we should take you on a roller coaster! Eh? Well think about it. I'll hold your popcorn and wait for you at the exit.

Happy Birthday Dad!

The Par-tay

Remember when C&B got married a few months ago? And then there was a big party in a walnut grove by a pumpkin patch? And I kept saying I would put up pictures of it? But I haven't yet? And even the wedding photographer had all her pictures up and ready to go and stuff at least a month ago (way before me)? Well. Good news and bad news. Good news: pictures are here! Bad news: there are probably more here than you ever wanted to see. Again, sorry that they're in single-file style. Someday I'll learn how to format things better.

When I say the reception was in a walnut grove I mean it was IN a walnut grove.

Okay some of these photos were not at the reception location, but clearly we were already celebrating in our hearts.

The wedding party. Looking very...wedding appropriate yet casual enough to engage in a little bocci ball later.

Getting tips for their own upcoming nuptials.

If you provide candy, they will come.

It's hard to tell who's winning in this intense game of bocci, but I'm definitely liking Kim's technique.

Bouquet by Kalea

C&B leaving the par-tay to wild applause

D tries to burn the grove down, has second thoughts, makes a feeble attempt to put out the fire and then walks away. But I should just let you watch it.

Roommates

I realized the other day that I've had 29 different roommates over the last ten(ish) years. Yes. I actually sat down and listed them out. For curiosity's sake. And I only forgot the last names of three of them. And yes, for those three I turned to facebook in an effort to, I don't know, search their first names and see if a last name that rang a bell popped out. But there are a lot of girls named Kristy.* Search unsuccessful.

Anyway 29 roommates. And of those 29, I only knew/was friends with/was related to eight of them prior to living with them. That means I lived with 21 people without knowing a thing about them before sharing a refrigerator and a bathroom with them. What can I say, I'm a risk taker. And I count myself pretty darn lucky that I haven't been traumatized by any of them. There were no psychos, no one who constantly cooked smelly food, none who stole money from me (I don't think?), and none who tried to kill me in my sleep.

Some were more fun than others of course, and there was that girl who didn't like that I breathed. Not, like, mouth-breathed or snored or something. Just breathed at all. I only lived with her for a month but I'm pretty sure it was the hardest month of her young life. At least that's how she always acted around me. Luckily she eventually married a sailor and I think she's fine now. I don't know, shockingly we don't keep in touch. ...Maybe I should try to find her on facebook.

I also had a roommate who would hide her food in random places. She was one of those who managed to stay skinny no matter what she ate so she'd bake a cake or a batch of cookies, eat half of the cake (or the cookies) for dinner and then hide the other half in her secret spots around the apartment. My other roommate discovered these secret hiding places and would, naturally, help herself to the goodies. We had a strict "finders keepers" policy. And no, she didn't share her spoils with me. I only found out later that she'd been stealing the hidden food. So. Greedy.

Anyway overall I've been really lucky with roommates. A lot of them have become really good friends. We've gone on road trips together, they've taken me surfing in Hawaii, they've accompanied me on my dates to ward talent shows (awkward but kind of hilarious in retrospect), we've spent entire winters snowboarding, they've tried to straighten my hair, they've written and sung songs to me for my birthday, and they've entertained me by losing all sorts of bets and having to perform various tasks (like wearing just a bathing suit around the apartment complex and asking random guys if they wanted to go hot tubbing). What. I was just trying to teach them the ills of gambling. Mission accomplished I believe.

In a couple weeks I will have a brand new roommate. Except my new roomie is someone I've lived with before so, although I look forward to living with her again (despite the fact that when we were in 5th grade we agreed after a week of fighting brought on by her vicious libel and slander - yes, both - she would write ridiculous accounts of our evenings in her class journal and then read them aloud during the sharing portion of class. ...I think most of the stories involved me speaking like one of Tiger Lily's tribe), she's not technically my 30th roommate. No, lucky 30 is still up for grabs.

This is the part where I should make some hopeful wish that it'll be a boy (i.e. husband - not someone with whom I'm just living in sin) but that feels weird. Maybe because I'm too old to make a sarcastic remark like that and have the family members who read my blog not think "aw, sad. She's trying to hide her pain. Lets set her up with someone we know. What about that guy you met on the subway? The one who looked kind of homeless? What was his name? Dusty buns?" (just kidding Ben, you can set me up with someone who has a nickname that reminds me of dust bunnies anytime). So in lieu of being sarcastic, my comment about hoping to have my 30th roommate be more like an eternal companion would have to be serious (or semi-serious). And that seems...odd. For a blog. For this blog. So lets just avoid speculation as to who lucky roommate 30 will be and I'll just check back in when that person moves in. In the meantime, welcome back roommate 29. Thanks for saving me from breaking my good-luck-with-roommates streak with an unknown 30th. I owe you.

*I'm not even entirely sure her name was Kristy. But I think it was. It was something like that. I remember she twirled batons to that Disneyland Electric Parade song. (does that count for anything?) She was really good actually.

Christmas Break 2009

Before I continue on with the C&B reception photos (coming soon 2010), may I take a moment to lay out my new years resolutions. Ha, just kidding. Although it seems appropriate to have a post about the new year or goals or reflections on how last year went I'm not in a goal setting mood. It's too early in the year for that. Plus in talking with Malinda's mom apparently it's a better idea to start your new life in line with the new moon. And the new moon isn't until sometime mid-month. So wahoo! No sense in starting a goal now when it would clearly be doomed to failure.

Christmas break has been grand. And by "break" I mean "day." One of the drawbacks to employment (usually outweighed by receiving a regular paycheck so it's not like this is a big problem) is that you're expected to work during weekdays. Including Christmas Eve, Hanukah, Kwanza (sp?), New Year's Eve, etc. So, while the traffic is significantly lighter during the weeks of the holiday season and therefore the drive to work is much more endurable, also you're thinking "I would trade in this light traffic to work to be like everyone else and not have to drive in at all during the holiday season."

Anyway since Christmas fell on a Friday this year it DID feel kind of like a miniature vacation to have a three day weekend. Extended into a four day weekend when I decided to throw caution to the wind and take the next Monday off as well. Let the good times roll.

So we did the usual Christmas vacation things: we watched several movies in the theater, had a volleyball tournament, played Rummikub, fixed puzzles, reenacted the nativity story (actually I slept through that - but I know it happened because I saw the video and yes, I'm sleeping on the couch in the video and yes, I enjoyed watching the baby Jesus repeatedly try to get Mary to smell his feet), watched football, went to the batting cages and consumed large amounts of food. I guess not all of those things were "usual." The volleyball tournament was the first of it's kind. We often play volleyball but not usually with such intensity and determination to win. ...Or at least not usually on such a nice court. We had only one injury (and it wasn't Grandpa) and we ended the tournament with pizza so I think it has to be categorized as a success. At least for those of us who remained uninjured and full of pizza. Also we discovered that Chris is a pretty great volleyball player. While we already had heard of his successful "feats of strength" career, there was no way to know for sure if such skills would translate over to volleyball. Well they do. That guy can jump. And with a few last minute instructions from Bryn ("go up to the net when the ball is on their side, when it comes back over back up and get ready to hit") he was all set. Now he just has to work on his Rummikub skills. muah-ha-ha-ha-ha.

What else? We tried spooner boarding down the iceplant stuff in the backyard. It doesn't work as well on those plants as it's supposed to on sand, snow or grass but it was still fun. Plus mom did it (sitting down of course - lets not get crazy) and broke the distance record set 5 minutes earlier by Kayla so clearly it was all worth it.

There were other things that happened too. But I don't remember them right now. I DID get lots of presents from Santa and that was exciting. So was my stocking - chock full of nuts (which I could crack myself - you appreciate it more when you work for it), a tiny game of Sorry and, of course, an orange. Score.